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Bert van Dijk - Influence Others, Start With Yourself

On Behavior And Leary’s Rose

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‘That’s just the way I am.’ A lot of people think that the way they behave is carved in stone, but nothing could be further from the truth. This book shows you how you can consciously choose to adopt the most effective behavior in order to improve your success rate at achieving your goals.

Influence Others, Start With Yourself uses Leary’s Rose interaction model to give you an insight into the different communication processes. Leary’s Rose is a schematic reproduction of different ways of behaving and the effect this has on other people. With the help of exercises you learn how you can choose to behave differently, how you can manage each situation and obtain the result that you want and still accept the other person for who they are.

This practical model can be applied in all types of everyday situations; a difficult work discussion, a business conflict or a difference of opinion about a holiday destination. It is just a question of making the right choice.

Published in 2010 | Paperback | 110 pages | ca. 30,000 words | With illustrations
Over 50,000 copies sold
Full English translation available

Chinese rights sold to China Machine Press
English and Dutch editions published by Thema Publishers

Download the English sample
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Bert van Dijk is trainer, with ten years of experience as a trainer and advisor for a large educational organization. He also founded the Leary Academy where professionals can learn how to influence others with accuracy using self-knowledge and people skills. Moving others smoothly how to adapt their behavior. Bert is an inspiring trainer, speaker and writer, he invites his audience to behavioral change with a humoristic and thorough approach.

RECOMMENDATIONS

Influence Others, Start With Yourself is successful in supplying practical tools and helped me chose the right behavior in the situations that required conscious and tactful interaction. Besides a practical model, the book also offers exercises that the reader can apply in their daily practice. Read the book, but most of all, apply the theories.’
Jont Groenendaal

‘A delightful book. You can start working with the exercises and examples or you can enjoy the familiarity of the discussed situations, and your own behavior, with a sly smile.’
Karen Coesmans, manager and coach

‘A clear explanation on the benefits of communicating deliberately and purposeful.’
Dutch Library Services

TABLE OF CONTENTS

Preface
Preface to the ninth (revised) edition

1 Introducing Leary’s Rose
2 Elaborating Leary’s Rose
3 Using Leary’s Rose
4 Applying Leary's Rose in practice

Appendix: Questionnaire Leary’s Rose
Notes
Literature
Detachable insert: Leary's Rose - color illustration of the model

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Chinese translation published by China Machine Press:

三个小孩在玩游戏
安东说:"我们来扮海盗吧。"
布鲁斯说:"不行,我们只有三个人,人数不够。
安东回答说:"那么我们玩什么游戏好呢?"
布鲁斯对此回答说:"我想去海边找贝壳。"
杰丝敏说道:"太好了,这主意太棒了。我也去。"
安东脸色变差了,他沉默抗拒。
布鲁斯继续说:"等我们有了很多贝壳,我们将可以拿来当作海盗的宝藏。"
杰丝敏再次表示:"太好了,耶!"
现在安东也加入了,他完全被说服了。

简单的一个场景中,蕴含了无数沟通行为,行为之间互相影响,只要稍有变化,结局可能天翻地覆。

如何有效控制自己的沟通行为,在不同场景下选择不同的沟通面孔,对于你想达到的沟通目的尤为重要。

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